River Song, Master of the Twist

Hello, Sweetie!

One of the rare characters that links a handful of the Doctor’s together, River Song has been with us since the Tenth Doctor and continues to privilege us with the occasional visit.

The coolest part about River is that she’s running on an opposite time line to the Doctor. The first time the Doctor met her was the last time she saw him. His first kiss was her last. Even so, she rarely spares a moment to get emotional.

Each time she shows up, you can bet it’s going to be one of those episodes. And by ‘one of those’ episodes, I mean good and memorable with some kind of surprise.

Here are some of the surprises that River Song has dropped on us over the seasons.

She knows the Doctor’s real name

During their first encounter—her last—they battle the Vashta Nerada. In the final encounter she knows she needs him to trust her and does so by whispering the Doctor’s true name in his ear.

She’s Amy and Rory’s daughter

Rory and Amy had a baby girl once. It was a birth that took place long after we ever met River Song. The baby, named Melody Pond, is kidnapped in an episode that features River Song. It’s then that she reveals she is their daughter. When Melody spent some time in the gamma forrest, her name went through a rough translation. The names were switched, first for last, last for first, as some cultures do. ‘Melody’ turned into ‘Song’, and since the only water in the forrest is a river, Pond became River.

She Killed the Doctor

More than once. At least, there was more than one attempt. She poisoned him and shot him. A few times. The poisoning was a misunderstanding—and and unsuccessful attempt. When she learns that her killing the Doctor is a fixed point in time, she tired everything to save the Doctor. Which throws all of history into chaos. But as wibbley wobbly, timey wimey things go, there’s a loophole and everything is restored, including the Doctor’s life.

She’s part Time Lord

No, she’s not the Doctor’s daughter! Though, don’t feel too bad for thinking that. Even Rory had to wonder. Due to River being conceived on the TARDIS, as well as spending some gestation there, she was imbued with some of the same power the Time Lords possess. In the episode, Let’s Kill Hitler, she’s caught by a stray bullet in a form we don’t recognize. She then regenerates into the form we all know and love. The question becomes: how many times can she regenerate? But that question is answered when she gives all of her remaining regenerative power to the Doctor to save his life.

She Married the Doctor

Yeah, she did! Just before shooting the Doctor three times, which was part of the ploy to trick the universe into thinking he was dead.

Did I miss anything? Probably. Tell me what it is!